Hello Chantel,

A couple of years ago I went through a hard break up as well and the first thing I want to say is that this pain will pass. It was something hard for me to believe. I thought it would last forever but it doesn’t, it will go away and if you work on yourself, you’ll get out of it stronger.

Now, focusing on the relationship itself, you said that you were dating but weren’t official, eventhough this seems like a problem to you. I know it might be hard to read this but if he wanted to commit, he would have done it already.

In fact, he was in a very easy and comfortable position. For 4 years he had all the benefits of being in a relationship, without actually being in one. So obviously he is now mad at you. Your decision puts him in a uncomfortable place but even with this, he’s not ready to commit to you so he tries to blame you into agreeing to his terms once more.

The wise thing to do is listen to his words and actions. From your post, I read that he doesn’t truly want a commited relationship with you. I know it’s hard but, again, from what you said on your post, it seems that you did the right decision by not settling for this any longer.

You deserve someone that truly wants to be with you, be part of your family and daily life. However, in order to have this person, you’ll need to free the path – this guy is just blocking the door.

Wish you all the best!