He hasn’t to my knowledge actually hit my Mum. He has threatened to throw her through a window apparently when they had one of their regular arguments. I’m sure he would if the outcome wouldn’t be his children never seeing him again. I just don’t understand how that level of anger is ‘normal’ to them. Even my Sister was defending it as just how some couples deal with each other. There was very little other end of the spectrum, Never really heard him say he loved her. Only bought flowers when he had to and fulfilled his obligations. Has never seemed like he even likes her.

I also don’t understand why he is this way when his Dad was the same. He apparently had to get in-between his parents when his Dad would get aggressive. When I blew up at him I mentioned that he just doesn’t have the emotional vocabulary to deal with other people in a decent way. When he doesn’t get his way or even if he feels like its not going his way. He’ll shout everyone down to get his way. Which obviously he’s paid for with all his work. I just don’t understand why he would even have a family if he resents having to work so hard to the point where he’s laying into people all the time. He can be chill sometimes but he’s very quick with an I told you so if it turns out you make a mistake that he warned you about. There’s not much room to make your own mistakes.

I guess I also had similar with my Ex where I wasn’t able to contradict anything or counteract something without her telling me I was restricting her. The words ‘I told you so’ would never have gotten half way out of my mouth.

I think for Christmas I’ll just keep the peace for my Sister and Mum’s sake. Everything else I’ll just have to play by eye I guess. Just not having much trust in myself. Everyone else seems to have a lot more experience manipulating people than I do. Feel like I can get taken advantage of more easily than others.