Dear Cali Chica:

#1 and 2 read very reasonable to me. Interesting I forgot about that part, that I felt that I was harsh to your sister earlier and I expressed that to her and to you when I restarted the communication in her newer thread this year. Yes, I remember now, let me access memory and see how it all connects, if it does, I will do stream of consciousness then, type away without re-arranging thoughts:

In her older thread ending in June 2018, there was a dynamic (and I am keeping in mind to not share with you what she shared with me) where she posted very short posts that “sounded” angry to me, but I couldn’t be sure, they left me annoyed, uncomfortable. And it happened a lot, repeatedly, short, abrupt, angry-feeling posts. That built up some anger in me, over time. And I expressed it in some ways. Fast forward, in my communication with you, it “sounded” to me, from reading your posts, that she was kind and nice and really trying, so I started at one point on to regret my past anger at her. Thinking I judged her incorrected, that I misunderstood her. That she stopped replying to me because I was a b***, that is, an angry woman myself, angry at her for no valid reason.

Next I started communicating with her and she was as sweet as can be, and a very pleasant experience followed, for me, I got emotionally attached to her, the photos she sent me, the details of her life led me to feel affection and closeness to her. There were some troubling expressions but I figured life has been tough for her, is tough, challenges and all, so I kept at it, keeping the computer on later in the day, into the evening, a new behavior at the time, so to be here (or there) for her, sending her good night messages.

Next, something happened, what was it.. don’t remember, she got angry at me, I explained, she responded well enough, I thought the problem was over, the next day, she was at it again, and then she spit the poison (aka bite), and I knew at that point that this is not good.

Now overall, what I think about your sister: I think I got to know her better. I think she is as sweet as can be, as delightful as can be and she is a very angry person. I figure now that I was correct regarding her short, abrupt posts in her old thread after all. She was frequently angry at me. At times during that old thread and when she participated in yours, she was affectionate and gracious, even more than you were, grateful and all. But she has another side. It is two sides at opposite ends of the spectrum, very nice on one, very angry on another, and the anger, her anger being indirectly expressed so that you are never sure, that is overall infuriating, I mean, not knowing when and where and what does this and that mean, what is she saying and where is she coming from, what does she want.

My understanding of her now is not the same as when I renewed my communication with her this year. I was .. mesmerized by the very nice, affectionate part of her.

anita