Dear Anita,

Some more thoughts on why I have these downfalls of emotions from time to time.

The reasons why I feel awful are:

• girls around me having partners (and/or parading their relationships and how amazing they are)
• girls around me having friends and I don`t
• girls around me having succeful social media “lives”
• girls around me looking super confident
• girls around me having all these amazing hobbies
• girls around me living on their own in amazing homes etc.
• seeing couples on the street and on tv

I might be jealous or envy. But I dont think I am. I just deeply believe I will never have another chance in love, or ever be able to have a fullfilling relationship, a loving boyfriend, unstoppable confidence and so on. I fear I will always be friendless, loveless and just a "beggar". Always getting the sort end of the stick. Why? I dont understand. Everyone says Im too beautiful for all that - whatever that means. Still, my good looks never got me anything. It was my hard work. And at times I feel lifes been super unfair to me. Dont I deserve a warm hug? A loving man by my side? Holidays and weekends and dates and sex for Godsake ? Whats the stopping agent to all that. And thus, thinking about all that, I get depressed.

My sister says that I wrongly persive that everyones living amazingly 24/7 and the lives Im jealous of are 50% exaggerated self promotion and 50% boring routine. Maybe she`s right…