If you’re dating in the U.S., you’re going to find this is a very, very common belief among men. Most men do not verbally express emotions but do it through actions instead.  For instance, my dad has only told me he loves me maybe 3 or 4 times in my nearly 38 years of life, BUT he has always been there when I needed him, goes out of his way for me, listens to me when I talk to him, and is always happy to see me and happy to talk to me, therefore, I know for sure that he loves me without him having to say it. I don’t believe he would feel comfortable expressing feelings through words, and I can say the same for a lot of guys I know.

So what I’m basically saying is that if this is something you’re not okay with, that’s okay. It simply narrows your dating pool, at least in some countries. I do think lot of men are getting better at embracing emotions these days, but many were raised to “man up” as your boyfriend said, and I wouldn’t ever expect their views to change. It’s what they were taught from childhood, and those beliefs tend to be deep-seated and hard to change unless they actively work on it, and most men won’t because it’s socially acceptable (and encouraged) for men to be this way.

So your only options are to not pursue him and find someone who expresses emotions verbally or accept that he won’t and look for signs of his emotions in expressions and actions. Long distance relationships can make this harder as well because he isn’t there in person to show you how he is feeling through actions, but you can usually tell how someone truly feels about you by paying attention to what they’re NOT saying, like in the example I noted above with my dad.