Dear Anita

There is a thunderstorm this morning and listening to the rain is relaxing, I love watching the lightning light up the sky, the static in the air fills me with energy and the loud thunder is like a drum that releases the tension in my mind as I listen to its rumble, nature’s music is the best to relax and enjoy the little things in life. The quarantine makes things quieter and I find that it helps me de-stress with less people around making me feel less self-conscious. I still have anxiety since I’m around my parents who tend to yell at me every now and then and sometimes don’t really provide much emotional support when I feel sad. But I feel lots better because I’m taking the time to meditate, listen to nature, get healthy exercise and do some spring cleaning. I find myself getting up early in the mornings when it is quiet to meditate or journal and it helps me de-stress throughout the day. I hope to lower my anxiety more so it’s not overwhelming before the fall 2020 semester starts. I think that I will always have some anxiety being around my parents and not being accepted for who I am, but I think that as I work on my spiritual self, I might be able to manage the anxiety better. Although I miss going to LGBTQ events because of the quarantine, I find it helpful to talk with the LGBTQ community online and since I enjoy writing to people (I tend to write better than speaking in person), I find myself building connections in the LGBTQ community and I feel better about myself knowing that there are people who struggle and we help uplift each other. I love the LGBTQ community with all my heart because they have helped me find a sense of self and provide me with hope during the stressful times. I love the blog on tinybuddha.com as well because I find journaling my thoughts and reading over past posts helps me understand how far I’ve come and to remind myself of things when I feel lost in myself. The quarantine may be the time for me to work on myself and understand what career path to go for because I love the sciences and helping people and I was thinking of helping the LGBTQ community, it would be great to study health sciences and neuroscience to help the LGBTQ community with mental health resources and promote better health care for people. Although I’m not sure what career exactly that I want I know that I love being a creative scientist helping out the LGBTQ community and know for certain that I want to transition to feel more comfortable with myself.