I just mean that I REALLY wanna keep seeing her, but more often. But now that this virus is around and social distancing I don’t wanna give it to her or anyone she cares about (or anyone for that matter) as that would destroy me, but I NEED to see her still, but I can’t and I am torn. I don’t know how anyone can see their friends right now…there is a deadly virus going around the globe, find other ways to entertain yourself! so…I wont be able to see her until there is a vaccine but I can’t wait years to see her again and phone calls once a month MAYBE for shorter and shorter time is not enough, not even close. Let’s wait 2 years to see eachother just so I can see you once a year lol wtf? why? I love her, I should just leave her since she keeps refusing to see me but it’s ok seeing her friend next door all the time. What does that say to me? “Sorry but you’re just not that important to me, you’re one of the least important people to me I MUCH rather be around other people”.

Should I just do a full disclosure in a few days? or leave it alone and fade away. I don’t wanna keep being like this and feeling this way the rest of my life. I’ll even tell her that I have pretty much loved her since the beginning and that when I got people to her job all the time it was so nobody forgets her, but I am pretty sure I did that so I don’t forget her.