Dear Meera:

“Its a forum so I can be truthful”- there is a saying: the truth shall set you free, so better be truthful here, there is no downside to being truthful in an anonymous website if you are communicating with a person who will not turn your truth against you (I will not do that!)

“my father is an abusive person. I have always seen my mother silently being beaten up.. I have always seen (them) fight while gr0wing up. It still goes on at my home”- this explains to me why you are angry, what is fueling your anger. I imagine you feel empathy for your mother, angry at your father for mistreating your mother, and maybe you feel angry at your mother for not standing up to him and making him stop.

Maybe you figured that you don’t want to be like your mother, be a victim, a weak person, so you chose to be like your father. Not that you made those choices with much thinking. These choices are more instinctive.

Please do update me at any time, and feel free to keep the conversation going with me.

anita