“if you say to her anything that has the hint of conflict, she will not hear you.” – you are so right anita! I understand it in my heart and I do still kid myself that she will come around so to speak, but….

I don’t think Scenario # 1 or 2 is  healthy for me. I feel like no matter what I say or how carefully I construct a thought, it will be interpreted by her as a confrontation. I am almost sure she will say something like, ‘what can we do to move forward?’, to which I still feel, is having an honest relationship, which doesn’t seem to be possible for her at this time.

For choice # 3 – how do I verbalize that? Or do I just ‘do it’.