Dear Chi:

You shared that your brother doesn’t like your dad with whom he lives, that he doesnt5 really speak to your mother, that your sister doesn’t want to go on a mini-vacation with your mother and you, because “she didn’t feel like being criticized by mom for 2 days”, and then you proceeded to criticize her and your brother: that they two of them “were the ones making everything weird.. that she was weird”, and you threatened her that if she didn’t join you and your mother on the mini-vacation, you wouldn’t speak to her”.

Here is what I suggest: do not talk to your sister or your brother about her/ his relationships with their parents. Have the relationship that you want with your mother; have the relationship you want with your father. Don’t tell your sister what kind of relationship you want her to have with your mother. Same regarding your brother.

It is fair for your sister to not go on the vacation with her mother and you, for whatever reason. It is her business, her choice to make.

If you withdraw your involvement in your siblings’ relationships with their parents- your life will be simpler, and so will your siblings’ lives be.

anita