Katie – “I guess I want to believe there is truth to what he says when he says he loves and misses me. He has even gone as far as to say he doesn’t want to be with her and “she’s just not me,” but as I mentioned above, he claims to be happy with her.  He tries to come to my home which he knows is wrong. Every time he says something inappropriate to me I remind him that this girl would not be okay with the things he’s saying and he says he doesn’t care. I’m just so confused. He’s working so hard to keep me and it’s just destroying me.”

He definitely needs to be open and honest with the woman he’s currently with, that’s really shady if he isn’t. I can see how much this is bothering you, which is completely understandable. Like, for example – I told my ex from (2016-2020) about how I wanted to forgive my X from (2009-2014) prior to her and she was fine with it. Not that I needed approval but we are still very close friends and felt it was important. When I actually got the opportunity to see and talk with my X from (2009-2014) recently, I had told her and told her how I felt. She was hurt that but she understood that it was time, I was surprised that she was hurt by the encounter, already knowing we had discussed me forgiving my X long ago already.

Point is, being open and honest is always best no matter what, I’ve always believed in that. If he’s spilling out his feelings for you and keeping it from the woman he’s with, there’s undoubtedly a problem. However it is also your life and your choice on how to go about that with him. You could always say to him ” Does your GF know that you’re in contact with me? and that you’re saying all these love lines to me?”

I wish you the best Katie and the way you are feeling is natural and you have the right to know. My belief is that, he should be honest with both of you and not hiding things but not everyone operates the same I guess. Don’t understand how someone like him could carry such secrets but I am ME and he is, who he is. Hope he does the right thing and that you get the peace you deserve.

Sending you so much love, positivity and light during this time in your life.