Hi Anita,

Thank you again. I’m checking out Mark Williams now.

In answer to your questions:

Experiencing anxiety – both myself and my sister were shy, quite clingy in social situations, children but I’m not sure anxious, apart from the separation thing. I remember being in early teens waiting for my mum to get home from work, and saying if three cars go past and they aren’t her then she’s not coming home (ie something bad has happened). So I think I was always anxious about the possibility she might disappear.

My first experience of “rejection” was around the age of 17, and I had nobody I felt I could talk to about it. This gave me strong negative emotions and caused me to secretly self harm. Something I have only confessed recently to a friend.

I have gently enquired with my mum about what I was like  after hospital but it’s inconclusive. She was concerned with the fact that I was not mentally or physically impaired due to the illness, so I think that was what was foremost in her mind. She mentioned that I wasn’t fully alone, that a nurse would check my vital signs every 15 mins.

M