Dear Anita:

I didn’t mean to appear as fickle online. Unfortunately, I still have issues when it comes to opening up to people about who I really am. It sounds completely irrational, but I always think that someone I know will come onto this website, they’ll be a person I know IRL, and then they’ll confront me about what I wrote about them regardless of what the situation was. That’s partially why I haven’t been as open to you lately. I care a lot about how I appear to the public eye. While I’m mostly private in real life, I sometimes get really terrified at how people can find where you are on social media. Whether it’s from searching your name, or seeing you tagged in a post, you’ll always be discovered.

Truthfully, I kind of like having a little mystery to my personality. If I’m mysterious, then you’ll always be surprised by what I reveal about myself. I don’t know. Maybe spending too much time on Twitter with its Cancel Culture has impacted me more than I thought. Cancel Culture is a term where someone can say or do something controversial to a public forum and then other people will find so-called “receipts” about how horrible of a person you are. Sometimes I think that’s justified if the person has broken the law, but other times, I think it’s so extreme. But in a way, it was kind of my own fault because I don’t take enough time on Tiny Buddha to reread past threads to analyze how I come across to you and other people online. It’s a good thing I’m a writer. In a way, you can come up with your own interpretations on who I desire to be as a person. That being said, if you want me to be more vulnerable, I can do my best to answer as honestly as possible what you want to know about my life. It won’t always be easy because I’m still healing from unresolved childhood trauma. I truly hope that helps and you can feel free to tell me about your life as well.

Sincerely, Aiyana