@Jay2023

First things first bro, never apologise for feeling low. You feel how you feel, no one should negate that. I offer advice but that doesn’t mean I expect you to post you agree with it or to post only when you are feeling positive.

Writing out your feelings helps, you can see the progression. On bad days look back and see oh yes I did have a better day there so this low will pass. On good days look at the progress.

We’ve all been there! I understand the feeling you’re just going through the motions to keep up appearances. Don’t pretend, faking it is what gets us into the shit in the first place. We placate, we pretend it will get better but in reality what we need to do is feel all the feels and realise that those emotions we were trying to avoid are there to serve a purpose. They will in the end make us stronger. Showing yourself self love, being firm in who you are, expressing your emotions will help. Just keep reminding yourself that no matter how crap you feel things will get better.

Its ok you’re feeling low, it’s been 5 weeks. Each person heals at their own speed. You are grieving and no emotion will be constant or linear. There will be periods of feeling f**k it to periods of wanting her.

I think what you do need to really figure out are your feelings stemming from losing her or because of underlying fears and insecurities? It appears from the outside that there is something within you that believes this was your shot, you don’t believe there’s better for you even if you know you deserve better, would you say this is accurate?

Mourning perceived potential is dangerous you need to be aware that the “potential” was never there so technically you’re mourning something you never had. Can you answer this question,  what did you enjoy most about this particular relationship and was it really enough?

If it had been a situation where you had stated this woman was great to you, supported you,  expressed her love and encouraged you but something had felt off to her then I would encourage you to try again. In this case, I honestly do believe once you reach acceptance you’ll realise that this person and type of relationship is no where near what is out there.

I’m pleased to read there’s support in the form of your sister. It’s good to get out if you feel. Likewise if you want some time to yourself then thats perfectly normal too if it’s sadness only. Howevet if it’s depression, isolating yourself will only feed the narrative you are all alone.

Mate do the hard graft of learning to love yourself,  being better and I guarantee you will be in a much happier place 👍

• This reply was modified 3 years, 8 months ago by Danny.