@Jay2023 you’re a bigger person than I’ll ever be. It shows if you even contemplated taking on 3 children. I just don’t think I could without having my own first. So right away I’d steer clear. I think it’s also quite selfish of her to have introduced you to her family I.e. kids knowing she was unsure. As a mother instead of having a revolving door of men enter and exit I’d want stability for my children. So I think you’ve avoided bigger problems down the line had you stayed longer.

I think no offense to you in this instance she came back to breadcrumb so she had you available when she needed you at times she was bored, lonely and horny. Most women only sleep with a guy they are unsure about to get their needs met. This is why I asked did you ever buy her things because she could have also been using you for gifts. GOLD DIGGERS exist. A self respecting woman would never go there. Eventually the guilt must have got to her.

I really am sad to say I don’t think she came back to you because she cared because at no time have you indicated she supported you. Also she couldn’t have been fighting for some love because when a woman is in love she is all in. Like I said earlier takers don’t know their limits. They will use you without a thought for how their actions impact the other. When you come across an emotionally unstable person this is what happens.

I’m so happy with the movement you’re making, CBT is all about your capacity to change and believing you can alter the negative thought processes. It is something I did with the support of my bestie who has a masters in psychology. It does work. As long as you’re willing to put effort and change then I think you will make it a success and get out of that hole. Jay surround yourself with people who love you and will support you during this time and your progress will be incredible.

I hope you are starting to see the glimmer now. Baby steps toward a better you. How’s your sm hiatus going? Any slipping? Might help to just block her.