Dear Teak,

You are 100% correct. I’ve noticed this lately as well and that’s why I have been working on this specifically. Not changing who I am, but simply giving up on this idea of position returns or any kind of returns, expectations. I help my friends because I care about them, not because I want them to like me or do something for me. I spend time with my dog because I want to and not. because of any other reason. I am studying super hard non stop these days because I want to, not because I must. I am not expecting anything or desiring a positive outcome. Like in the book, the peaceful warrior, “I am here, I am now”. I know it’s a lot harder in reality, but I am learning and trying. It’s just that my hole is so deep that I can’t help, but to feel like a failure, but I am learning to forgive, to give up, to be as is, and to look ahead instead of behind, while living in the here and the now.