Evening guys hope your all well and had a good day. Welcome back Rhaenys, thank you for taking the time to read through my posts, I’m sorry that you have had to go through a similar experience, it really is the worst and most challenging episode I’ve personally had to go through so well done on making it to where you are now and what you have achieved despite the way you have felt over the last 9 months, from both our circumstances it’s comforting to know to their are people out there in the same boat wanting the same things, it’s just down to fate that we meet them one day, thanks to Sammy and Danny I now believe this will happen some day and so should you! Its good that you have found someone to chat to online if your isolated due to the lockdown, even if it doesn’t go anywhere it will help you with your confidence for talking to other people in the future.

Yes I’ve been quite lucky to have a friend who has been able to cut my hair, I’ve got to go his salon now though, was quite nice to have a home cut service!

Guys I’m gonna be honest with yous, I’m really disappointed in myself, after last night I cracked on looking at SM after seeing the profile picture change, I just couldn’t help myself. From what I can see the other person I see her in a picture with her has deleted her on fb so who knows what has happened there, I know this is completely irrelevant to me now as I should be moving as far away as I can from the situation, i feel like I’ve destroyed all the determination I’ve had the last days and making myself anxious from speculating on something that shouldn’t be important to me. I’m just reopening old wounds, I’m going to start over as I was doing so well and felt like I was making progress with starting to get away from feeling like crap, there’s only so much the medication will help if I won’t help myself. I’m just hope I don’t have to wait too long for an appointment for counselling as I think this will really help with preventing me from making these mistakes, I think where I’m fighting so hard everyday I’ve just ran out of energy to keep it up.