@Jay2023 you might not be over her quite yet but its obvious your over it (the situationship you had) otherwise mentally your reaction would not be so calm. Especially given you suffer anxiety.

Jay I’m not convinced you actually miss her, it comes across as you miss what you had; company, warm body, all the feels of being in a romantic companionship. Because you just revealed something very telling, you want the fantasy, not the reality – think about that.

Meaning, you fell for your idea of who she was rather than for who she was truly being.

When you find yourself slipping into those fantasy reminds yourself that nothing was followed up by real congruent action. This will help you further let go of these fantasies and instead learn to cultivate a real authentic deep intimate bond with someone in reality in the future.

Again I think right now the focus should be on how you’ve overcome a significant hurdle. The first dreaded meeting with an ex. The ones from this day forward only get easier!

I think your haircut is perfectly timed too, it will give you a new sense of being. Onwards and upwards!