Dear triss:

“I have no idea what I’m doing, my life is scattered around…  I am so lost… I don’t know what I’m doing – I just know right now I am absolutely heart broken – and I just want to find my way back to myself – and purge this awful feeling out”-

– this is my advice:

(1) Remain in your brother’s home. Do not go back to living with your husband. Minimize your contact with him, and see to it that you are never in his physical presence alone.

(2) As much as possible, separate your finances from your husband’s today. Plan to start legal separation and divorce from him in the next few weeks/ a month, taking one step at a time in that direction.

(3) If you are employed, focus on your job and think of it as an important part of your daily routine. Add to your daily routine aerobic exercise, such as a daily half an hour to an hour walk, and other predictable activities. Daily predictability and routine will provide you with the safety and stability that you very much need.

(4) If psychotherapy/ counseling is possible for you- do that. Look for a support group online and/or in-person for women in your position. Post here again anytime you want to, and I, for one, will reply to you.

anita