So having a job or not is not the main issue.

Oh yes it is, in order for me to be in a relationship in iraq i have to have some requirements, job is the first, and i can’t move anywhere without working a minimum 5 years or so to get enough money to live (if its illegally which is the optimal way to get a visa there)

What I was rather saying is that it’s unlikely that you can have a loving relationship considering your apathy

Yes this might be true, by the mindset i have, no woman would want to live with me, most of people care about life and want to live and do things, things that might involve thier partner, things that i might not like, if this is the case, then yes, its totally on me and my beliefs, they might live miserablly.

everywhere must be brainwashed and cruel and will mistreat me. Wherever I go, there is no point in trying because the result will be the same. I will be hurt.”

Im really not botherd much about people being brainwashed, and i don’t see them as cruel, to me people are extra, not a neccessaity, i believe most of them have good intentions and are good, and believe me, they can’t hurt me, and if they did, it will be on me, because i allowed them, evil exist, i don’t go around blaming evil for existing, i blame myself for being hurt by such evil.

When i loved sara, a friend of mine, i was gonna work for her, just to not give her a reason to dislike me, i did things for her, things that didn’t mean anything to her, i didn’t know how to show her love, everytime i tried she ended up being more defensive, ignoring me.

What i did, being welling to work, to sacrifice my time, something that i highly value, was wrong, i would never do that again, sacrifice myself for another person, no matter how much i think he deserve, i would only subscribe to such idea again, if the person willing to do the same for me.