Dear Jisoo,

Hi Teak, your description of him is hilarious

so it means it might be true? 🙂

I always wondered why is he single still .. he matches all society standards and seems to be a good catch.. well settled, good looking, polite, decent and extremely charming personality. As far I remember our earlier conversations, most women before me ..tagged along with him until they understood he is not ready to commit or marry

Yes, this is typical of narcissists – it all seems perfect, and yet, something’s wrong… And the fact that he was always polite, calm and put together – like a robot, you say – it’s definitely a pretense. You say he worshiped you, but it actually may be that he “worshiped” you only when you worshiped him. He liked his own reflection in your eyes… Well, it’s good you put an end on it…

As for your fear of guys disappearing on you:

But now in my current state, I get extremely clingy when the new guy disappears, think I am wrong or unworthy of love ..whatever it is. I don’t feel secure.

you say you react by believing it’s your fault and that you’re unworthy of love. I am assuming that this feeling of being unworthy of love existed in you even before, but was triggered by the trauma of your husband’s death. Sometimes some of our early trauma is buried and only gets triggered later in life. Do you think this might be the case with you?