Hello Andi,

It seems to me that Lisa has been very unreasonable with her demands over her wedding.  She has probably gone through a very stressful time planning her wedding which has added to her anxiety levels and you seem to be bearing the brunt of some of this.  The fact that she didn’t support you sufficiently through your own trauma is a separate issue.  Some people just aren’t able to empathize but to suggest that you are delusional or a liar is crossing a boundary from which there is no return.  Things and people change through time and your relationship would be changed by the fact that she is now married.  I suggest that you use this as a convenient time to reinvest your energies into other relationships as well as yourself and give your ex-friend a wide berth, mentally as well as physically.  You had a friendship that lasted 20 years.  There is always some give and take in relationships.  So what if you gave more than her.  That’s to your credit.  Accept that it is now over and lay it to rest.

Peggy