Dear Sami:

I love your take, I think you’re absolutely right and it just clicks for me.

I feel like the hole absorbs everything: good or bad, I feel like I am but a fragment of who I was and those good feelings I used to have are gone. I feel like it stems from my very core: my back, my hips, my throat hurts from all this suppressing. I would love to be free from my own mind, my insecurities, my low-self esteem. I wish I could just feel full and happy again. I am aware I’m missing something but I don’t even know where to start. I think that I became aware of  this problem this year because I am afraid of not being enough for my students and not being up to standards. I somehow can’t seem to feel enough.

I appreciate your insight! Thanks for helping me through this.