Dear Girija:

“I can’t help but think the odds are against me…. it would be looking for a needle in a haystack. But I’m afraid my needle will jump back into the haystack after seeing or getting to know me or that I’ll never find the needle” – you have cute ways of saying things (the needle jumping back to the haystack, funny). To state the obvious: there are plenty of beautiful women whose needles jump back into the haystack, just saying.

“I have already mentioned my looks. I could better them and they will only get better to a certain point” – I just imagined your looks, as you described it, but you are still cute. Okay, not pretty- but cute, with cute expressions. Don’t underestimate cute!

“The way she described intimacy was so beautiful. I’m scared I will never experience that… I am afraid I won’t get to live a life with intimacy and love” – interesting, you are not experiencing intimacy with a man in the present time, yet you are afraid that in the future you will not experience it. You are not afraid now about not experiencing it…  now?

“The dilemma is do I wait and possibly never find the needle. Will I know when I’ve found the needle?… This has me torn” – your dilemma is whether to wait or to be looking for the needle now?  I say: look for the needle now. More precisely: look at needles, get to know needles (outside the physical intimate context!) Don’t settle for any needle: choose the best available needle for you because your cute self deserves the best! All this will take time, so might as well you start looking tomorrow!

anita