Dear anita,

I would like to give you the whole list, but after burning it (a recommendation of a crisis therapist) i can only remember some points, maybe the most important ones.

– my ex was dissatisfied with my sleeping habits. While i was struggling with the correct doses of my medication and struggling with life choices, i had a hard time sleeping. She told me that on weekends, i shouldnt sleep longer than until 11 am, mostly i slept until 12, because she would wake up at around 9-10.

– my ex was unhappy about how often i texted her. She wanted me to text her about almost everything i would do during my days, when i would do it and with whom i would be with.

– my ex felt pressured about me asking her how she was doing, especially her mental health. She refused to tell me anything about her feelings and called me her ,,therapist”, even though i made it clear multiple times that i wasnt interested in the specifics of her problems, i was intetested in her wellbeing and didnt want to discuss anything, just wanting to know how she felt.

– my ex pressured me extremely to get more therapy, most importantly to her i should go into a psychiatric clinic. I still dont know why the clinic was so important to her, because she didnt care which clinic. She told me that my problems with suicidal thoughts would make her anxious when i would need a few days (1-2) alone to cope with them. This argument hurts the most. Not only because my therapist at the time gave me praise when i explained how and why i did my coping the way i did; but also because around half a year before i got the list i followed my therapists advice about not suppressing my suicidal thoughts which would lead to my knock-out days. I had no more knock-out days for 6 months when i received this complaint.

Ed