Hi EllGee

I’m so sorry, that is an awful situation to be in. I hope that you are taking extra care of yourself during this difficult time? It sounds like you are putting a lot of effort into handling everything and taking care of your children.

The only thing that I would suggest is that perhaps he should be politely encouraged to re-engage with his children. It is not fair on you or them that he has stopped performing his parental responsibilities. He only lives just over 1 hour away, it really isn’t that far. Of course, this should be achieved in a safe way, without exposing them to verbal abuse.

Some parents from abusive backgrounds have difficulty with teenagers as they explore their boundaries and freely express their own opinions. You also mentioned that he doesn’t like his opinions being challenged which fits with the theme.

I’m curious if you have had any recurring themes in arguments during your marriage over the years?

Sorry I don’t have more to share, this is a reflection of that I think you’ve done a great job trying your best to resolve this situation. Also, Anita has already given you a lot of good advice.