Dear Madina:

“I’ve always dated men, but I had abusive violent relationships. .. men hurt me… I am scared of men, I am so scared of being hurt or abused again, I don’t feel safe around them…. for me it’s safer to be around women“-

-it is safer for you to be around women because you are not romantically or sexually involved with them. If you were, you wouldn’t be safe from relationship violence.  Relationship violence is so common in lesbian relationships that there is a whole Wikipedia entry on the topic titled  Domestic violence in lesbian relationships. It reads in part: “The issue of domestic violence among lesbians has become a serious social concern… Some sources state that gay and lesbian couples experience domestic violence at the same frequency as heterosexual couples, while other sources state domestic violence among gay, lesbian, and bisexual individuals might be higher than that among heterosexual individuals”.

From Ananaias Foundation which offers help in regard to domestic violence: “Despite our assumptions about domestic violence, rates of abuse in LGBTQ relationships are as high, if not higher than in heterosexual relationships. In fact, it affects bisexual women and transgender people more than any other groups”.

Were you aware of this information and if you weren’t aware, does it make a difference to you in regard to the topic of your thread?

“I had abusive violent relationships“- would you like to elaborate on this: how many of your relationships with men were abusive and violent, what was the nature of the abuse and violence…?

anita