Hi there, It’s Ivygrl,

Before I start, I need your advice to be in a longer, opinion based, and specific written format because I prefer those messages better.

I’m happy with the first weeks of school, but I am worried, because I really want to visit places alone, and get a phone. But due to my consequences it won’t happen. I quit making my dreams come true. No one in Twitter ever likes me, and it’s time to tell you this but I don’t know anything about what I really want. My mom says I’m not good enough at reading books because the internet is ruining my life. She said if I don’t read, and keep reviewing the internet, I failed to be a better person. And you’re right, @Helcat, maybe it is my fault, and taking my title of “my fault” is something I cannot fix, because my mind is like a trial/jury and I’m always scared and anxious and jealous and upset. I work hard and don’t make many friends, because I can’t fit in or become social enough. I’m scared because if I do the wrong thing, like cry, scream, steal, be rough, scream at friends, or just get out of school, I’m in huge trouble. I have to get a phone now just like everyone else or it will be too late, but since I can’t do that, I quit.

I have to tackle tough issues like “Allegory of the Cave” from Plato, or that article about doctors (or creative people) trying to sew patients (or items) but can’t, because they use smartphones or internet too much, and lost all confidence in sewing the patient. You get all this, right??????

I don’t like horror stories anymore, because they are too scary. But now, I do like different genres: comedy, slice of life fiction, adventure, and fantasy. I also like classic books. I want to make my stories and turn them into short stories but I don’t know what to do now, because I’m not a good reader at YA books. I’m just better a shorter novels, or short stories, or…just novels or graphic novelist comic/webtoon comic art.

1. WHAT CAN I DO SO THAT I CAN JOURNAL???? I’m scared of the blank pages and I cannot write anything down! And my journal is JUSTR A PAPER JOURNAL!!!! Please please please answer my question! I’m panicking here and that’s what my life is like: people avoiding my life!! Ands please make it specific!!

2. What can i do to get what I want? I always get nothing rather than something. Because I am invisible in real life.

Please Help!!!

From, Ivygrl