Dear Julia:

I hope that in my last post of 5 days ago, I didn’t veer too far off from your personal experience and described instead, my own personal experience. Growing up, I am the one who lived within parenthesis: a non-entity, overlooked, unheard… unnoticed. My life growing up was boring and non-stimulating (except for the emotional pain that kept occupied and my exciting pleasurable escapes from misery via elaborate daydreaming).

I was so focused and so immersed in my mother’s misery that I HAD TO MAKE HER HAPPY before I allowed myself to attend to myself, before I had the right to be happy. I tried to help her by doing the dishes and cleaning… but she said I did it wrong and caused her even more work than if I didn’t try to “help”. As a teenager, I read psychology books and I tried to present to her concepts and ideas so that she will correct her thinking and live a better life… but all in vain.

I hope to read more from you, Julia.

anita