Dear Anita & Tee

Thank you both for your insightful response. It lightened my bulb about being Empathic. I should try to be more empathic than trying to not criticize. I put some TED videos on my watchlist to understand Empathy on deeper level. Also, I think it’d also be really helpful professionally too, Since I’m in Management position so I should be listening with empathy than criticize or judge.

Tee said
“And since there is not just an expectation, but also pressure that you put on her, that’s not really kind and caring. I think it’s closer to controlling”
I agree with that because in the past I used to be kind of controlling person. And I’m still working on that

Maybe you don’t like her complaining
Yes, I don’t like when people complain and not doing anything about it.
Although now I know what you mean is really emphasizing but mostly what I do is when I listen to complain I directly go for solutions

 I think the urge to change her
Not really. I may have reacted like that, but I don’t have intention to change anyone. as I said before I just listened complains and went for solutions that’s why

Anita said,

it seems like I suggested to you that there is a connection between your present problems and your childhood,

Yes. Because I was unsure and maybe I still am?
The thing is that one side of my action-oriented brain like “okay, so you know now. What now? How to solve that?”
(I think it may or may not be side effect of working at so “Fast paced start-up” I don’t like this word anymore because getting things done right away mentality)
But another side of my brain knows that these things (Like CEN) take time to heal. Taking small steps and figuring things out (Example: today I knew that I have to work on my empathy skills)
One part of my brain is very impatient, and one part is patience so that’s why I’m unsure and you feel I had a change of mind

 stop redirecting your criticism of your father to ===> your virtual girlfriend (and possible future real-life girlfriends). You know how it feels to be criticized… don’t do it to the woman in your life, or to your future children, in the name of being a “very caring person”, be it a very-caring-boyfriend/ husband, or a very-caring-father.

Yes, you’re right thanks for point that out. That’s why I have to work on my empathy skills because I’m realizing just because I’m being hard on myself, I don’t have to be hard on others. I need to be more compassionate with others and myself.

this is what criticism (the boldfaced) 
Yes, I agree. I’m getting better at not listening to others criticism.
And also, lately I’m talking to myself positively instead of directly attacking myself with criticism.

Addy