Dear V

Agree with Anita and she is definitely right about that. You should not doubt your instinct. If it doesn’t feel right to you, then don’t do it.

I find that in this forum, by discussing our ideas, it actually helps me to reflect on my own experiences as well.

I would like to add that we have to understand that people are on a “spectrum” (say, a scale of 1-10, with 1 being the most “conservative”, and 10 being the most “redical”). I guess the majority of the group, in your case, will score “higher” on this scale.

There is no right or wrong about it.

I would say that I am comfortable with discussing the type of porn that I like, and even some of the things that are normally  “personal” e.g. what would you prefer to do in the “intimate” scenes – I have no problems with that.

I can proudly say that I am a bisexual and my partner knows it as well.

I have discussed it in social settings with friends that I know and ones that I don’t know that well. It can be embarrassing, however, it is such a great relief that I have shared some of the things that had been troubling me as well.

They can use it against me if they want. I wouldn’t be affected by that, as I don’t think there is anything wrong with it. It is more of a reflection of their character, that they would use such things against you.

I do not intend to run in the presidential election nor am I a public figure, and I trust that the friends that I share this to will not use it against me. But if they do, I am quite determined to cut them off from my life PERMANENTLY. They are aware of that. I do not have any tolerance for people that go against me and I suggest that they don’t cross the line.

It is normal for some people to need a lot of it, and there is nothing wrong with people who do not need it (and do not want to talk about it at all).

You are absolutely right. You do not have to talk about that with your friends. You have the right to remain silent on things that you don’t want to talk about.