Hi Palegazesunnidays

That makes sense, I can see that you are very grounded and able to see situations for what they are. You have a wonderful level of self awareness.

Thank you for clarifying about your brother. I can see now that you were treat differently. I can only imagine how much stress you and your family were under with a sick sibling growing up. It’s unfortunately common that the healthy sibling is left to take care of themselves. It’s a difficult situation but it is a shame because it does have an impact.

I can see that even though you find it difficult to say no to people when you are struggling. You see the red flags and you are concerned for your own wellbeing. This is very healthy, I’m pleased for you. Since you have left unhealthy relationships in the past, I believe that you can protect yourself when you need to. You are getting better and better and faster at identifying when things aren’t working out.

Dating is really difficult because there are a lot of unhealthy people out there. The prevalence of abuse is quite high. I feel like at every stage of the dating process, it’s a waiting game to see if any unhealthy traits are revealed. Once you’ve been together for 6 months people believe they don’t need to put in as much effort. Once you move in together you find out what someone is really like. When you see them suffering you see them at their worst. Once you’re married, well they don’t need to worry anymore because you’re locked in.

For me, what I appreciate in dating is someone who is willing to listen and try to fix problems. Everyone has problems, no one is perfect.

Have you made any decisions yet about what you’d like to do with A?