You know what, ironically, he said I felt too many emotions and was too sensitive but in reality he was! When I told him he didn’t make me feel beautiful he said in a joking/sad manner “if you know you will leave me” I always thought this was a joke but he clearly doesn’t know what a joke is so this was true, wow just dimming my light! When I told him he didn’t tell me I was beautiful enough, I think I mentioned before the words of affirmations, when I would tell him I didn’t get what I needed there he would get sad! And say “that makes me so sad you don’t think that” and he would tell me “it’s so sad you don’t hear them, you never listen.” Which I think telling me I didn’t listen was gaslighting as well because it made me doubt my listening capabilities, I’d ask myself, “was I really unaware of a compliment? I don’t hear him?” Making me think I was the problem.

Anita, let me know if this sort of venting is okay for you me to post here, if you don’t want to read the negativity I can journal in my personal notes. I just think either way daily journaling will be good for me 🙂

seaturtle