Dear John:

“moving way too fast and saying way too much too early in a relationship…  I just need to practice the patience I am so desperately trying to learn…  I just need some support with patience“-

– Here’s a quote from Goodreads that’s relevant: “Patience is where we realize that to rush something is to compromise it to its own destruction. Maturity is to realize that the most effective way to stop the destruction is by beginning to develop patience. And the first place that we need to do that is with ourselves.” (Craig D. Lounsbrough, a counselor/ life coach)

Here’s a quote from the bible (1 Corinthians 13:14), also relevant: “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.”

Quotes like these inspire me to develop more patience.

A major factor in learning patience is tolerating discomfort, to say to yourself, when uncomfortable (anxious, hurt, angry, bored.. impatient): This is merely uncomfortable, not intolerable. In other words, increase your tolerance for discomfort. It is an emotion regulation skill, aka distress tolerance. In developing distress tolerance, mindfulness practices are very helpful. Regularly listening to/ watching guided meditations, available free online, is one such practice.

For the impatient, it’s difficult to slow down as the guided meditation requires, but if you tolerate the initial discomfort involved, it will help you tremendously in learning/ developing patience.

anita