An abusive parent would be one who only deals with their own wants and needs and neglects the child’s wants and needs. A good parent lets the child grow. Watches for those milestones which indicate proper growth. Feeds and clothes the baby. Clean when needed. Baths and changings.

And much talking. Yes, talking. Thru talking the baby learns language and learns to interpret sounds. Exploring is how they grow. And baby proofing is how we feel better that they will be safe. Cabinets with chemicals are locked up. Windows have safety bars. Dangerous areas like kitchens are bordered off to keep baby from hot stove or cold refrigerators or knives. And baby always has their own place to sleep. Of course touch is important.

Some say not to hold the baby too much. Others say (me included) to hold the baby when you can cause you won’t be able to when they are older. And then when they find everything curious and ask a thousand questions, use your imagination to answer with thought and love.

They will then grow up to be self centered. Everything is about them. But, that is how we made the world for them. It has always been about the baby. But, we talk it out. And they grow. We give good advice and they disappoint. Hopefully they learn enough to be good people and have children of their own that you can spoil. Yes, we do discipline but not harshly. Appeal to their minds and sense of love and justice.

The amazing thing is that children will learn to forgive our mistakes and we continue to move forward. Sorry for the rant.