Dear Omyk:

I am sorry that you lost your wife!

“My in laws told me that they expected me to look for a new partner and remarry soon, for mine and my child’s sake. They said this two weeks after I buried my wife! Other friends reassured me that I’ll ‘find someone.’“- your wife’s parents and friends thought you can easily replace your wife with another woman, just like that! They were after an easy & quick solution to a tragedy that had befallen you.

“I am increasingly liking my independence… I’m starting to believe that I can grow into this… not wanting to have another life partner… I honestly don’t want to use someone who wants to date intentionally. This is not about sex – I have a reasonably strong moral compass and I would want sex only if I was going to actually marry for love… I have two challenges. the first is myself. What system of accountability mechanism can I create to hold off the occasional weird urge to sign up on a dating app?“- respect your liking for independence. I hope that you place your strong moral compass above an occasional urge.

“he’s still happily married and somehow seems to think he knows more about post-marital dating“- he thinks he knows more. Doesn’t mean he knows more.

“My friend told me that y’all helped her through a tough situation with a borderline bf that ended better than she expected, so I’m hopeful for some wisdom here. A big thank to you all.”– please say hello to your friend!

About wisdom: replacing your wife easily and quickly is not a wise endeavor, nor is it respectful to her or to you.

anita