Thank you Anita and Helcat,

I currently see my psychiatrist and psychologist for years now. I have boderline personality disorder which overlaps with bipolar 2. I went through childhood trauma. I always go for the wrong men because I feel ugly and worthless. I wish I could put a mask over my face.

Im angry that he treated me like a fool and the worst thing is he told me he does not do relationships, he does not want to get married and he does not want kids. Now he is in a relationship with a woman that has two kids – I thought it was only one. The worst thing is he works in my department and these days he is never at work because he wants to be with his girlfriend.

Im so angry I wish he was regretful for what he has done to me. Im so scarred after this because rejection kills me. I never want to see a man again, I just want to be alone because Im not good enough and I will never be.

Im angry at God because he made him happy and Im sitting with the pain, the suicidal ideas. I love God dont get me wrong, but man I am so angry.

This guy got everything. He got happiness. He got a beautiful girlfriend, and I just want to die. And Im planning on doing that. No man wants me and Im never going to be a mother. Im always going to have hurt. And I just want to dissapear. He always tried to get in contact with me, when I finally told him to stay out of my way, now he hates me. And he shows me he hates me. Which makes it worse. I wish I was good enough, but Im not. She is.