I had decided I would take it slow and remove myself little by little, which would cause more pain long-term, but a little comfort now. Ripping the band-aid right off has never worked well for me. But, after how I felt last night, I decided that it is better if I just remove myself entirely. I got to be a part of his world for awhile, and now it is time for me to go, and not just because he’s kicked me away, but because it is better for me. I suppose the better way to say that is he was a part of my world for awhile. He introduced me to many things, taught me a lot, even saved my life, quite literally, over the phone. I think that’s part of my strong attachment. I can always go back to the game after I don’t feel the pain anymore, if I am still interested in it. But I am certain that will take a very, very long time. Much longer than the original 30 days I have given myself for a break. I am feeling strong at this very moment but I know that I will feel weak again and may give in before that time is up. Last time I made it only 8 days and they were torture. For now though, I will try to stay strong.

Thank you so much Albana, much love to you.