Thank you @yogikaren. I googled thr lyrics of the song and it cheered me up a little. I’ll try my best to take the new approach, looking in new perspectives. But I wonder if it’s okay to feel so angry and disappointed with myself. I cant seem to get rid of the blaming and scolding in my mind. I’m not this negative before. It’s worrying because I feel like I might become uncontrollabke and get consumed by this self hatred thing. I wonder how or what or when I can get better and stop my family from worrying abt me. im afraid that this will affect me in a long term as well. What if every setback I encounter turn me into a self loathing monster? can I ever be strong and independent?…