Moongal,

It sounds to me like your fear shifts your brain into a debate, which uses up the inspiration, concentration. By the time the time rolls around, you’re exhausted! And no wonder!

Its easier than that. When the time comes, if you want to, do. If you don’t, don’t. Your heart knows, and in the absence of fear (or tamed fear), the path you really wish to take sparkles, feels right.

When we can see this, learn to trust ourselves, we let ourselves stay present. Instead of washing the dishes and debating pros and cons of the evening, we just wash dishes contentedly. Senses working, health, strength, whoohoo. Then when the time comes to decide, we can just decide and jump in. Stay home or go out contentedly, either a dance. When we jump from fear (and most of us do that a lot) we figure that out at some point, and when we see it, the heart gets wiser. Jumping more accurately, dancing more balanced, in tune or whatever.

The fear itself is perhaps you don’t know if you have what it takes to dance. Can you really trust your rhythm? Which path is right? Left or right? What a nice field for healthy self debate! Just fear, a maze. The lesson of the maze, drop the maze. Set down the debate, and breathe alongside the dishes. That’s where all the magic is. 🙂

With warmth,
Matt