Hi Bruce,

If you have the desire to move ahead, especially with all this great advice including the kick-in-the-pants great advice from Jasmine, I’ll offer something from my own shame history that might help you get a new approach going.

Spaghetti. Whether it’s called spaghetti or pasta, kids often call it pisghetti or scabetti or something else. Whatever. No matter what you call eating spaghetti, to me it’s an allegory for life. Oh you say how?

When I was in grade school, say third grade, at the time home life was a total mess. When I came to school I was steeped in shame. This was a heavy, heavy weight that I wore. I constantly felt low and that other students were noticing my bad clothes, my bad teeth, my bad life. No one actually said anything or pointed me out, I put on this heavy burden myself. I recall how I especially hated days when spaghetti was on the lunch menu. Spaghetti is a big mess to eat. The pasta is out of control all over the place. You can’t really get it on your fork. The sauce is all over. You try to twirl your fork and it all just unravels. Spots of red sauce land off the plate. (Everyone in the lunchroom must be watching this kid try to eat this awful stuff.)

Last night I went to a favorite restaurant for some delicious carb loading. On my current nutritional plan, pasta is a periodic, strategic pleasure. I confidently order my spaghetti with seafood, or meatballs. A big serving. “No bread thank you.” When the food arrives, I put my napkin on my lap to start and then it finds it’s best location throughout the meal. I dig in and eat away. I twirl to get a small, medium or large amount of pasta on my fork and with a sloppy mess of it hanging I go ahead and take a bite. Spaghetti falls to the plate in strands or piles. A spot or two of sauce finds new places on the plate. I enjoy chewing and savoring the mouthful while looking around at the folks nearby. Maybe chat, drink up some water, ask for more water. Sometimes wine. The chef or cook put a lot of thought into making this great dish, I came in, sat down and ordered it without looking at the menu or hearing the specials – and now I’m enjoying it!

Bruce, do you feel this? I’m the same person that hated eating spaghetti in third grade. The difference is now I know life is messy like spaghetti. It’s also awesome to savor! 🙂 Now go eat some spaghetti.

Big blue

• This reply was modified 10 years, 5 months ago by Big blue.