Dear cold stone,

When we do ‘wrong’ action we bring about our own suffering

Towards the very end of his speech, the Dalai Lama says that when we cause the suffering of other beings and when we do not foster compassion for others inside of us we feel very very, alone; we wrap ourselves into a cocoon, isolated from others. Compassion for your husband;for the pain you know you have caused; will bring about happiness, love and compassion in yourself. Until you do this you will feel alone, isolated, cold. Guilt is not the antidote, but compassion and love for a being you have done wrong to will help bring you peace and happiness. We cannot do something harmful without it harming us.

While we all seek our own happiness and lack of suffering; we often step on and over other people in order to get it; but this brings disharmony and unhappiness. You feel alone because of your immoral actions here.I feel compassion for you that you were very probably suffering and this caused you to have an affair. But you cannot run from yourself, your life; this will only make you suffer more.

Until you develop compassion, love; then the lonely feelings (the result of your harmful action) will continue, you will not ever be happy ans peaceful.

Love to you and good luck on your journey, what we do can be made right by neutralising the suffering in ourselves and others, caused by wrong action; this can only be done through OTHER focus, love and compassion. By focusing on the other, our own suffering turns to peace. There is no other way; the self connects to the actions we commit against others.