It’s not my guru is bad . He was ok when I want to left completely he just told me that think about your dad , we can’t keep you holding back .then thing got worse when I ask forgiveness and said I want to stay at home to take care of my dad then he try to convince me that if you stay as nun then you should stay at nunnery , but I had such a hard time ther I couldn’t say yes .he even ask me to think about it theme I kept saying that I want stay at home that’s when he got angry . Now I don’t know what to do . I can’t go back ask for forgiveness as it’s been two month , I don’t want to I can’t stay at nunnery , as well now I don’t want to stay as nun as well . It’s all happen because of my stupidity .
When I went to ask for governess I was so emotional . It’s all happening because of me I don’t know what to do .