Hi Luna,

I have to say that your situation hits close to home for me. I too have had a similar experience with my best friend. We were really close for 2-years, hooked up, I had a lot of strong feelings, she said she did, but then grew distant at the same time. We ended things romantically almost a year ago and tried to be “just friends.” Things started getting weird and she was growing more and more distant and was still playing with my head. I was a mess.

About 3-weeks ago I wrote a long email to her telling her my feelings over the past 2-years and told her that I just could not do it anymore. One of the main things that made me decide to write such an email was a quote I read, “People may not always tell you how they feel about you, but they will always show you. Pay attention.” I had tried everything I could think of to make a friendship work. Reading this quote I realized that at one time in our relationship she showed me she loved me without using her words. Overtime, she showed me that she didn’t love me and care about me by her actions, and this was where it hit me.

Her reply to me was cold and heartless. Thinking that she really did not read the email and “hear” what I was saying I asked her to read it again and be honest with me about her feelings. Yesterday, she replied with the same response originally and was still cold and heartless. It was then that I realized that I don’t need this kind of energy in my life and that it was time for me to really move onto the next chapter of my life. I have not replied to her and I don’t plan on it. I have had a lot of support from others through this situation and they have told me that I have put WAY too much energy into this friendship with no respect or care in return. It consumed my life.

I read a quote last night before bed (which happens to be from the Tiny Buddha app), “I deserve relationships with people who treat me with love and respect.” This morning another popped up, “Sometimes you have to forget what you feel and remember what you deserve.” These hit so close to home for me and made me realize that my decision to move on is the best decision for me. I need love and respect in my relationships, no matter what type of relationship it is, and if someone cannot be courteous enough to give me that, then I do not need those people in my life. It is not helping me heal, recover, and grow it is just holding me back.

Good luck with your situation. Others have been there, like me; you are not alone!

Take care!