It sure did take a lot from you man, my relationship of almost 4 years ended almost two weeks ago. I got a lot taken from me too, (im not trying to compare to you here, just trying to relate) including my confidence, a bit of my appetite, and a tonne of happiness. But I know inside that this is a blessing as I was getting way too comfortable and I would never have worked on myself in that relationship the way I am now so I know that in time I will have experienced a net gain out of this event.

The easy part i think is that the things that have been taken from us are things that we used to have, many of which are critical for us to live, like happiness and fulfillment. So you see, you have to get it all back and then more, you have no choice, your body will force you to breathe when you don’t feel like breathing. Its an extreme analogy, but I think it is quite accurate.

I understand that you feel far from the person that you describe in a list that you make about yourself. That is okay, this is square one man. Stick to that list, and repeat these characteristics in your head everyday. If the statement: “I am massively confident” seems way too unreal and your mind is refuting it, then change it right now to “I am becoming massively confident” and that should stick a little more well. This is what I do by the way, and I repeat these affirmations in my head everyday, and I try to do them whenever I get a minute or two alone.

Imagine this person that you are going to become in the future, this confident, happy, awesome, and loving person. Note: (you actually are this person already, you jst have to stimulate and activate your “awesomecells” and “happycells” to wake up and start functioning again.)

I know, that was cheesy and strange, but you already read it so too bad, you’re gonna think about those aweseomcells now constantly, sucka.

Hang in there graffinLA, keep doing what works for you. You have great people around you who love you, and one more coming soon haha (congratulations on the new baby!)