I have thought a lot about this myself recently and I have come to the following conclusion with regards to situations in my life right now:

I think it’s unrealistic to say you don’t have expectations. Everybody does it’s natural, however I think the way you deal with the outcomes of your expectations is different. If something doesn’t turn out the way you expected that doesn’t mean that life is cursing you or kicking you in the teeth, it may simply mean that the universe has other plans for you and the way you come to a plan or desire may not be in the way you expect. For example I am currently unemployed. I had a plan, I expected things to turn out a certain way then I lost my job and I had to completely change track. I didn’t expect this at all but I decided to embrace it and think ok maybe I’ve been put on a different path for a reason and this fork in the path, although not what i expected may actually be a blessing in disguise. It may not but by accepting that my expectations, in this case have not been met, I have opened myself up to new expectations. So what I’m trying to say really is, It’s not that you shouldn’t have expectations but more the way you handle the situation when you’re expectations are not met. It’s like life, we all must be fluid and embrace change and live in the moment as none of us know whats round the corner. Also expectations are very much down to conditioning. What we expect in life can quite often be what society has told us we should expect. This could be to meet someone, get married, have kids, hold down a stable job etc etc so when we find ourselves planted outside this set of circumstances our expectations aren’t met so we fret and feel bad about ourselves when in fact we just need to embrace the path life has set us on and adjust our expectations accordingly. I think it’s like life, fluid, ever changing. Expectations can be painful but only when we see them as set in stone.

As Buddha said – All suffering derives from attachment. Attachment causes desire, desire causes misery.

I take this to mean attachment to a certain idea or person and a perception of how we think things should be, an expectation about how that person should act or how we think a certain situation should pan out. Learn to be fluid with your expectations, have them but know if they are not met that it’s not the end of the world. Choose to ride the new wave and be open to where it takes you.