Hi Nicole,

I have a few thoughts on these issues, but you may not like them…and that’s fine. At least you’ll have the opportunity to hear another perspective. I’ll take it step by step…

First…TRUST…the age old biggie. My general definition of trust is the ….”need for everyone else to act as I anticipate and believe they should”. I don’t care for the term trust. If I did, I, in turn would have to accept that I must act as others anticipate and expect me to act. I don’t care for that either. I make my own decisions, for good or for bad, based on my assessment at the time…not on what others expect me to do. I also believe others are likewise entitled. Our decisions may displease others at times, but that’s their problem. They are then entitled to react how they deem appropriate.

For example…you said that you had been unfaithful in all your relationships. You obviously made those decisions for good reason. How did you expect your, then, partners to react? Should they have TRUSTED you not to be unfaithful?

Once again, your Mother…you are expecting her to act as you believe she should. Is that realistic or fair?
I believe in respecting other people’s decisions…even if they are not in my best interests. We don’t know why other people make particular decisions, but they obviously have a good reason…in their minds. If I don’t like how it affects me, I either “make other arrangements” or live with it. it’s MY problem, not theirs.

As for deserving….where is that written? How many brownie points do we need before we are entitled or deserving?
No one is deserving. The Universe will decide how we are treated…irrespective of our evaluation of our worthiness.

The bottom line….as I see it….we don’t deserve anything, we are not entitled to other people acting in line with our “wants” and do we really need to forgive other people for living their lives how THEY want to?

As I said…mightn’t be what you want to hear, but it’s what I think….