Hey Dude,
I understand the whole online dating scene being like a bar scene. This doesn’t bode well for me because I was sick of the bar by the time I was 21. I won’t rate himself on a scale but I’ve been told that I’m a good looking guy by women. I can’t use the same description that you used to describe certain women that messaged you. It feels wrong for me to say that about someone who was born that way. There were some women that I just wasn’t attracted to messaging me, and I just thank them and tell them I’m not interested. It doesn’t take much to show that small courtesy and it would be nice to get the same. As far as the girls that I contacted go. I actually read their profiles. I don’t go for the party girls or the ones that think they are beauty queens. I’ve tried to find women with some depth and that have a down to earth attractiveness. Basically, the girl next door and a personality that is nothing like my ex’s.

It’s nice to hear you found a good woman that you enjoy being with. I thought I found one that I had a lot in common with me, and that had a lot of the same traits as me but it didn’t work out, and that’s one that I still think about sometimes. By the way, I haven’t messaged the woman who told me that a lot of people say she is attractive. I don’t have time for someone that shallow and that thrives on attention.

Katie and Pooch, I don’t know if I’m more serious than when I first went on the site. All of the rejection just makes you feel a little funny about the whole deal with online dating. Nothing about how my profile is written or how I send messages would make women think that I am jaded or bitter. Maybe people can sense that I want it too much and aren’t interested. Who knows.

As far as passions go, I don’t have a lot of them. I have always liked my music, and I play guitar, but I haven’t been playing much lately. I have focused so much on my sons’ happiness that it seems I haven’t really focused on mine enough. I know I need to get myself out there more and try different things. It is difficult when you spent so much time making sure everyone else was ok, it’s like you don’t know how to do it anymore.

I’ll admit that I do have bitterness towards my ex. I can’t help that because she was a shitty wife and she is a shitty mother. It’s difficult to not be bothered by someone who is always completely selfish and always puts herself before anyone. If this sounds like a rant, you would understand it if you met her.
When I dated those women in summer and fall, they knew some of my history and I knew some of theirs. One woman had the same thing happen to her. When I spent time with them, it was light and enjoyable. I look for women that aren’t like my ex and that’s what made one of the women especially great. I know that all women won’t be like the person I was with. I try to always go into things like this with a an optimistic outlook. I believe that there are plenty of good women out there.

James, I wish you good luck. I guess we have to keep believing that things will get better.