Dear eleve,

After reading what you’ve said, somehow I can’t choose to un-see what has happened.

Yes, I lashed out on him before. many times. It most probably contributed to what has happened. But like you said, it is now a life long lesson.
To be honest I think you’re quite right. We started when we were 19/20. And now 23/24. We were young, we were foolish. We did plenty of stupid things towards each other but we still managed to love each other strongly. Our love was true, I choose to believe in that.

We were the most compatible people I think. Everything we liked, everything we wanted. But maybe it just wasn’t the right time. maybe you’re right, he needed some time to be by himself. To grow up without the influence of me. And I have been too dependent on him. I was such an independent girl. But as time goes by, I just couldn’t stand up by myself. And it’s time for me to learn.

I think this break up is at the right time.

We both need to get stronger. I can’t graduate as a doctor like this. I need to be a proper adult. Although I think, we all never stop growing.

You made me feel much less stupid to beg and cry to him. When I read what you said about me being honest, I think I have no regrets. Yes, I begged. I’ve tried. I’ve conveyed my feelings and I am not ashamed. I loved him very much and I showed it all. I was pretty naked and transparent with no walls towards him. So yes, thank you for making me realise that.

THank you so much people. All of you helped me to come back to reality. To control myself and my sadness. Once awhile when I’m lost, I’ll be sure to come back here and read everything that all of you have said. It meant a lot to me. And it might be the only way I can move forward.