Hi Dee,

I’m sorry that you are going through this.
My first point…..what “Kath” said. She’s hit the nail on the head.
Second point….you probably know this, but you don’t know how to change your mindset. That’s the hardest part for all of us and there’s no quick fix. It’s a lot of hard and repetitive “head work”.

One thing I do know is that this old saying is very relevant…” Blame, anger and resentment is like drinking a glass of poison and expecting the other person to die”. The only person hurting here is you.

Your challenge is to work on your mindset…little bit by little bit…until:

1. You can accept that the reality is that people make mistakes, and they most often do that, not maliciously, but by ignorance or other distractions or other priorities. We don’t all live and think and react in line with your formula of how the world should work.
2. You accept that you you can make mistakes, once again, not on purpose, but because you had other beliefs or priorities at the time of the decision…eg the decision not to get a building inspection. I bet if you looked back at that moment in time, you had a very good reason NOT to get one. Just because events have turned out differently, doesn’t make your initial assessment any the less valid.
3. You accept that, because of items 1 and 2, life doesn’t always go to plan…and we have to make the best of what we have been dealt with. There is no alternative.

You won’t come to these understandings immediately, but over time, if you are persistent, you can change your beliefs. And it is your beliefs that will dictate how you react to everything the world throws at you.

Good luck in your journey….if you choose to take it.